Tuesday, October 16, 2012

what am I even doing here?

  Needless to say, life has completely turned itself upside down and inside out since I last posted here. A quick review of the current events:

 I'm 7 months pregnant with my 4th son.

 I'm homeschooling Hayden. Seriously. And I love every minute of it.

 Dylan got sick again. 2.5 years of wellness ended late September when Dylan began to slightly slur his words. Dylan spent a week in the hospital and now receives weekly steroid infusions through a chemo port. It's the hardest part of the week. We are both normally in tears at some point.

 I'm homeschooling Dylan. Seriously. And I love every minute of it. (he does too!)

 We have switched from a 50/50 diet of processed vs. homemade food to an 80/20 diet of processed vs. homemade food. The 80% is homemade, gluten free, organic as much as possible food. I have to cook 3 times a day now which is a lot more than I would like, but it makes me feel good that my family is eating a diet that nourishes and heals their bodies. So that keeps me going.

 So as you have read, things are a lot different here. I don't sew and create as much because I simply don't have as much time for that. I can't let housework go too much, because if I leave yesterday's messes for today, today is a lot harder. But sometimes in the afternoon I find a little crafting time while all the wildboys are out in the yard playing, and it really feeds my soul. I'm going to be finding a bit more time for it in the coming months as the holidays are nearing!

 Dylan. Dylan has been sick with ADEM 6 times in the last 4 years. He almost completely recovers every time and we are extremely fortunate for that. He has residual weakness in his hands which makes things like buttoning his pants, opening the van door and tying shoes a lot harder for him but other than that he is fine. He does also have some cognitive delays which he had before he got sick so it is hard to say that the ADEM impacted it.

 I decided to homeschool Dylan along with Hayden because I feel like Dylan would benefit from some major life changes. We had all thought that Dylan would never get sick again, that maybe he grew out of it because it had been so long since the last episode. It just shows that his little body is still so hindered by whatever is causing it. Whether it be heavy metal overload (things such as lead and mercury) or food intolerances or some rare genetic disease or maybe stress and environmental triggers. Whatever it may be, I need to lessen that for him to the best of my ability.

 While homeschooling, Dylan will not be at as much risk for catching "common" childhood illnesses that can trigger brain inflammation. Also, I can give Dylan the one on one focus I believe that he needs. He can work at his own pace instead of the pace the public school system has provided. (for the record, I am not against public schooling for all kids, just mine.)

 How is Dylan doing with homeschool? Great!! He is reading (seriously, reading!) short stories and learning to skip count and we are in our second week of our telling time unit. So far, they can tell you what time it is as long as it's on the hour, a quarter past the hour or half past the hour, lol. We just learned to count by 5's so 5 minute intervals of time will come soon, after we learn a quarter til the hour. That is certainly not all they have learned, just what we are working on this week. I do a bit of unschooling as well, if there is a particular topic of interest we will learn about it in a unit form, or as close to a unit that I can make of it. It's all about focusing on their interests as much as 1st grade curriculum.

 I really enjoy homeschooling my kids. It's a lot of responsibility. That paired with cooking 3 meals a day, potty training Jude (omg he's 2.5 years old, where has time gone?) and keeping the house clean, life is just much more involved now. And honestly, I like it better this way. There is no sitting back watching mindless television for me anymore ( Wife Swap, Weather Channel and any reality television show on MTV, I miss you dearly) I'm researching food information, home remedies and recipes.

 Sometimes I get overwhelmed with the information I pump into my brain. My husband asked me on Saturday why I don't want to learn how to play Magic: The Gathering, the card game that he is enjoying playing with his friends as of recent. I just burst into tears. The look on his face was a bit like a deer caught in headlight, Ha. I just can't handle anymore things right now. I can't put anything else in my brain unless it is extremely interesting. I can't play Magic and not cook supper or tend the the boys, or either I can, and I need to just relax and let things happen. Messes will be there upon my return, homeschool will figure itself out, and I am 7 months pregnant, I need to give myself a break.... I just can't at the expense of what I feel is right for my kids. But there's a balance, it's just not my strong suit.

 If you have read all the way down this far, hey, thanks. I needed to dump my brain out a bit before I jump in the shower and head to walmart. I need to remember to buy the ingredients for homemade fabric softener... let's hope I don't forget.

 Until next time,


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